Uncanny Signs 5

It's basically been two years since I put up one of these, but hopefully these are worth a laugh or two. You can check the others here!

  

19:  Prease Don't

Location: Oedo Onsen Theme Park

Category: Engrish

And they did so good with the rest of the English! They just had to let the "prease" slip by. But we're just getting started.

20: No Dibing

Location: Zauo Restaurant

Category: Engrish

Granted, this sign's more for fun that anything else, but you kind of lose points for execution here.
 For those of you wondering, yorokobi in this context means to display happiness.

21: Extraordinary Ladder

Location: Hotel in Hakone

Category: Engrish

Really? What's so great about this ladder?

22:Magic Mushroom

Location: Nokogiriyama Ropeway Station

Category: Lost in Translation

This must be one very trippy arcade game.

24: Emergency Panther

Location: Matsumoto Highway Bus Station

Category: ???

This one I really didn't think I would have stumbled upon anywhere other than in the the countryside of China. In case of fire, open the lock and release the panther! How the hell did this happen?

Uncanny Signs 4

Wow! Has it really been a year since I put up more of these? You can check the others here!

14:  No Women Allowed

Location: Fukuoka

Category: Distasteful

Yeah, this dates back quite a bit! Well, it sure gets the message across, but not in a very tasteful way huh?
 Welcome Emos! Prohibited to Womankind!

15:  OnAir!

Location: Ueno

Category: Engrish

What a mess! And this sign's pretty huge, too! And why the hell is waitress spelled with a capital W?
 The Waitress sounds like it could be a monicker for a wrestler. Or a sex position.

16:  Going Out

Location: Shopping bag, lady on train.

Category: Engrish

And this is the second shopping bag in the list. I caught this and my brother and we couldn't stop laughing. It reads;
"Please do not go out with having left me in the house. If I am here, can you go with you? I am unpleasant. I hate it being left."
 Can't blame you for leaving your unpleasant dog at home.

17:  *Pipi!*

Location: Nakano Broadway

Category: Lost in Translation

"I'm Nakano Broadway's Mascot Character PIPI!" reads that sign. Aala's doing his best Pipi face too. Man, what a disaster. Great going, Nakano Broadway.

18:  Theater Poo

Location: Shinjuku

Category: Lost in Translation

And perhaps the most shocking one in the list is this one.

 No better place to go to watch a shitty performance than Theater Poo! All publicity is good publicity, right?

Uncanny Signs 3

Let's see what I've gathered up since last time.  You can check those out by clicking here.

9:  Pee

Location: Shibuya

Category: ???

I'm a total loss when it comes to this one. This is deliberate, right? There's some amount of English on the sign itself. There's just no way the person responsible could have not known that "Pee" is urine. Who the hell wants to drink at a place called Pee?

Really? Seriously? Really?

10: Gosick

Location: Kabukicho, Shinjuku

Category: Engrish

It's a Gothic-themed host club. I'll elaborate about host clubs one day, but this is just an unfortunate mistake. In Japan, the word Gothic is pronounced "Gossiku." They kind of lost that one to the translation, and ended up with a bar called Gosick. There's a nice for everything, but I don't think anyone's willing to pay 10,000 yen to "Go Sick."

11: Don't Drop Your Loved Ones in Front of Trains

Location: Kita-Koshigaya Metro Station

Category: Unnecessary Signalization

It's arguable whether or not this is necessary or not, I think. But come to think of it, someone must have dropped grandma on the tracks like this. I just love the pictures with the DO and DON'T symbols. 

Maybe that would have sufficed on the poster. I can't read so well, but I can only assume that it says something the pictures already obviously show. It'd be nice if there was a caption saying something like DON'T YOU LOVE YOUR GRANDMA? or DON'T KILL YOUR GRANDMA.

12: dickbrick

Location: Koshigaya Laketown

Category: Unfortunate Accidents

Oh come on. Doesn't it look like dickbrick?

Lego dickbrick! This one makes me laugh every time. Bad choice of font, I guess.

13: Appetite

Location: Outside a sex shop in Kabukicho, Shinjuku

Category: Engrish

Oh boy. 

Over dramatic, for one, but these are also characters from a well known pre-schoolers' cartoon.

Uncanny Signs Part 2

It's that time again, folks. Let's look at what we've got this time around. You can check out the ones from last time by clicking here. Only three this time, but I love them so!

6: Vegitables
Location: Cafe Pronto, Kayabacho
Category: Engrish

This salud has lettus and avacado in it, too. Ouch, guys. Spell check, please!

7: GENTLE CHILD
Location: Shopping bag, lady on a train.
Category: Engrish

The glare of the light doesn't make it easy to read; it says the following:
"You gave all these gentleness of me and strength. Strong child treasure cute kid good child your word is like magic GENTLE CHILD SPLEASE PRAISE ME."
 Sounds like voodoo.

8: Fucking Hell
Location: Hakone
Category: Lost in Translation

Fucking hell! It's the perfect gift!
Complete with gratuitous swearing.

Uncanny Signs Part 1

I've gathered a number of these since my arrival in Japan. Here are a couple of signs and posters you couldn't quite come across back home. Complete with commentary from yours truly!

 1: BE* HoW gOOD
Location: Karaoke Bar
Category: Engrish

This one's a toughie. Most of the time when it comes to Engrish, you can understand what the writer was trying to say. The switching of the caps kind of offends the eye, and the asterisk after the BE makes you want to put emphasis there. BE! BE! BE!

2: KKK
Location: Parked in Ueno
Category: Lost in Translation

Oh no! I wonder if they deliver white robes with pointy hats. Honestly, now, if I were to start a company from scratch, I would at least take the time to look up the name beforehand. Y'know, in  case the company shares its name with another company, or a group of racist nationalists who lynch minorities and burn crosses. You never know!

3: PROHIBIT
Location: A hotel in Ikebukuro
Category: Engrish

I'm pretty sure by that they mean prostitutes. But why "foreign" ladies? Are local whores okay? Or whores who are not waiting on the road?
Is this too specific or not specific enough?

4: Don't Spit on the Conductor
Location: Ueno JR train station
Category: Unnecessary Signalization

I love this one. Is it really necessary to point out that it isn't right to spit on the conductor? Is it because this happens often? I can think of no reason to be this mad at a train conductor. Plus, the idea had never crossed my mind before seeing this poster.
 Also, I love the facial expressions! The rogue with the long hair is all like, "hey, fuck you!" And the conductor's face is all "Oh no, please don't!"
 If someone spat on my face, I'd flinch or close my eyes and shrink back a little. This conductor totally wants to catch the spit in his mouth or something.

5: The Bar Straight
Location: Kyoto
Category: Lost in Translation

I think they had in mind something like "Whiskey, straight up." But instead, this comes off as kind of homophobic, no? It's the Straight Bar. Oops.