Milestone: Month 3

It's time for a Milestone! Here's how I'm doing. You can compare to my first Milestone (month 1) by clicking here.


Month 3: Summary


Status:


Job: Children's Fitness Teacher
Financial status: Rather Poor (until first paycheck)


Location:

City: Tokyo
Ward: Taito-ku
Train station: Naka-Okachimachi
Residing in: Classico Guesthouse


Cast of Characters:


Major Characters:
Julian "Shank" Einschenk of Germany
Ken "the Frog" Tanaka
Kuniaki "Forest" Mori

Minor Characters:
Fumi, the ex-hostess
Miyamoto "Onii-san"
Takashi "Homoyaro"
Mr Bobby
Kimura-san
Kazuyuki "Kaz" Moriyama
"Yasu"

Retired Characters:
Anton "Foxboy" Jermaine of England
Rodrigue Zapha of France
Clement Sanchez of France


Top Five Highlights:
(since last time)


- The Japanese Outdoor Bathhouse
- Kamakura Town
- New Year's Sausage Fest
- An Open Mic Night
- The Maid Cafe


Still to Come:

- The Weirdest Bar in Tokyo
- Gundam Cafe
- Studio Ghibli Museum
- The City from Above
- Tsukiji Fish Auctions

A Maid Cafe

Oh boy. This evening, Ken and I went to a maid cafe for the first time. It was interesting, and I'm definitely glad I got to experience it, but it was also overpriced (for what it is.)

I ordered this thing.

 For those of you unfamiliar with the concept of maid cafes, it's basically a food joint where you get served by girls dressed like "magical" maids. They call you stuff like "master", and draw on your food with ketchup or other condiments. For an extra charge you can play Pop-up Pirate or Jenga with the maids. It's definitely too campy and sugar-filled for the common mortal, I feel. The whole setting feels like walking into a 6-year old girl's tea-time fantasy, except for the dozen or so business men also sitting down nearby. You unfortunately aren't allowed to take pictures at will.

Instead of cute, I just look like the world's gayest boxer.

 It happened something like this. Ken and I walk in and are offered a seat. A bubbly girl introduces herself and asks for our names, then places an electronic candle on our table, telling us it's a magical candle of wishes come true or some shit. She blows into the cheap plastic prop and it lights up! She then tells us that we have to hold our hands in front of us like cats and say "nyan nyan" when we want to order, before leaving to attend to her other waitress duties.
 So I do that (much to Ken's amusement) and order curry rice. She takes my order, and the candle with it, stating that she must do so before my dreams melt away. Soon, I am brought my order, on which she draws some kind of cat face.
"You must hold your hands out in the shape of a heart and say nyan nyan before you eat your food." So I do that (also to Ken's amusement.) The food wasn't terrible (but it was overpriced.) Soon after I finished my meal, the maids put on a small dance show and shut down for the night, telling us that "the kingdom is now closing."
 I wish I was making this shit up. I didn't hate it, but I don't think I'd do it again any time soon. Also, we were the youngest people there (asides from the maids, probably.) Tokyo, hurray!

Me Eating Natto

Natto is fermented beans. It tastes as weird as it sounds. They say a picture's worth a thousand words, so here are pictures of my reaction to the taste of fermented bean paste.

Here it is.

Here it goes.

...

Processing...

I feel like I ate an old man.

Lots of posts today, so be sure to scroll down or you might miss some.

Open Mic at Café Marché!

---Sweeeeeet Summer Sweat. It's Hotel California!

Yesterday evening I got an invitation from Ken to go to Toneri and check out an open mic event that was going on at a cafe he used to work at. I promptly accepted and joined him.
In all honesty, I wasn't sure what to expect- and it turned out to be totally great. Café Marché, the place in question, is a small business run by just about the nicest people you could meet on this side of the hemisphere, and I feel like I met a whole lot of memorable people.
Of course, I couldn't just sit by idly, so I gave it a shot and sang a few songs of my own, accompanied by a jazzy pianist.

Oh, snap, crackle and pop. There it is.

And it turns out Ken himself happens to play the violin.
 Shit, son. What a bad-ass. Being able to play the violin is only the coolest thing in the world, second maybe to summoning meteors. We later went out to another bar where I was introduced to a few friends of his, who I'd certainly like to have the pleasure of meeting again some day. Altogether, it was a good night (even though it snowed and the train ended up stopping and I got stuck in Toneri.)

PS: For those of you wondering, the songs I sang were Hotel California, Les Feuilles Mortes, and Never Gonna Give You Up. Aww, yeah.

Ken (the Frog)

Last week had me meeting Ken the Frog (a self-given moniker! The first!) Who I've been hanging out a lot with lately. And it turned out we have a lot in common, us being both half-Japanese English first-language speakers in our early 20's who enjoy creative writing, visual arts and singing. My friend network expands!

Meet the Tenants

We have a bunch of hispteriffic wallpaper and stuff.

It's been a few weeks since I've settled into my current guesthouse with Julian. Since then, I've had the chance to get acquainted with a few of the tenants. Here is a first set of observations, for shits and giggles.
The 1st floor is pretty much just the lobby and storage rooms. The 2nd floor is the men's floor, the 3rd is the women's, and the 4th and 5th are for richer tenants who could afford the bigger rooms (if I'm not mistaken.)
So what have we got...


ROOM 201:
Subject Name: Inomoto, surname unknown.
Codename: Decibel
Other Information: Nicknamed Decibel because he often talks to who I assume is his girlfriend over the phone very late into the night, for hours on end. He's noticeably pretty skinny and tends to wear tight enough shirts that his nipples can be seen doing their damnedest at poking through the fabric in an attempt to breathe. He once flicked the lights on and off by accident while Julian was showering, but altogether he's kind of polite and has made an attempt to communicate with me, mistaking me for a local.

ROOM 202:
Subject Names: Sean G. Nakagawa and Julian K. Einschenk
Codenames: The Alien, Shank
Other Information: That's us. Our room is messy. We try our best, though. We really need to vacuum.

ROOM 203:
Subject Name: [Data Missing]
Codename: Mysterio
Other Information: Not much is known about the mysterious tenant of room 203. He told me his name when first I moved in, but I totally forgot it...I think it was something kind of generic. He's probably in his early 30's. He speaks a very good English and told me he was in New York until 3 weeks before I moved in. Subject 203 is rarely ever seen during the day, but the light behind his door is on late at night. I think he's a salary man.

ROOM 204:
Subject Name: Mori Kuniaki and Kento (given name unknown)
Codenames: Forest and...well...Kento.
Other Information: Mori and Kento are our guesthouse buddies whose room is right across ours. They play Monster Hunter a lot. We occasionally go out together for food or karaoke, or just hang out in their room (which is bigger and cleaner, as well as better furnished.) Mori's a great help when it comes to getting some information.

ROOM 205:
Subject Name: Unknown
Codename: Pandaman
Other Information: The Pandaman sports crazy hair and is thus nicknamed because he is often seen sleeping under the heating table in the common room, or eating in the common dining room. Actually, that's all we ever see him do. He is literally a human panda.

Chilling With My Homies

Tsukimizake!

Today, after going home from work, I hung out with Julian, Mori, and his roommate, Kento (whom I will probably introduce more thoroughly afterwards.) We played Koi Koi until late at night, and it was quite enjoyable. Even though the game is Japanese, most of the locals don't know how to play. Asides from My Brother Miyamoto-san, Kento was the first person I met here who did.
 Mostly, the game is played by gangsters and homeless people, so yeah, I guess it should come as no surprise that regular folks don't know much about it.


On a different note, I'm glad to be able to say that my job is going very well and my boss has admitted to being very pleased with my progression. I'm still in my one month training, but that nice raise at the end of the month is getting closer and closer. Mm, I can taste it already.

Interesting Tidbits: In Japan, You Have Superpowers

It's true. In Japan, you have superpowers. Though I admit I'm not the one who initially found this out (I owe that credit to a similar blog appropriately called Gaijin Smash,) I have noticed that these superpowers, usable only by foreigners (Gaijin), do indeed exist. Allow me to paraphrase the aforementioned blog, as well as add a few of my own discoveries.

GAIJIN SMASH POWERS:
This first category involves all powers that involve imposing your will upon the locals in order to gain (sometimes immoral) privileges.

GAIJIN BATTERING RAM:
 Can you imagine plowing through the Metro gates back in North America? You'd get your shit busted in no time. It's impossible. However, in Japan (and I've witnessed this firsthand multiple times), if you're a person of a visible minority (White, Black, Latino, etc,) the option is yours to take. All you have to do is walk right through and ignore the siren. If the person standing watch calls out to you, pretend you didn't hear. What happens then? Well, the watchman will think you can't speak Japanese and won't know how to approach the situation. And that's it. You get through without a blemish.

It's my favorite one.

GAIJIN RADIANCE:
 If you speak English, you are capable of Gaijin Radiance. Use it. Go to a social event and speak to people in English. If they don't know how to answer you, apologize and find someone else. But if they do speak some English, well, you're suddenly more interesting than before. You're a radiant, mysterious foreigner who'll sweep 'em off their feet and take them to amazing places.




GAIJIN OPTICAL BLAST:
 You're in a crowded place and you notice people staring at you because you're a foreigner. You whip around and make eye contact with someone staring -- and their eyes go straight down into the floor in shame: Gaijin Optical Blast. Japanese people are polite to a fault and will definitely be embarrassed if you hit them with an Optical Blast.

PASSIVE GAIJIN POWERS:
The second category involves all powers that cannot be turned on or off. You just have them whether you like it or not.


GAIJIN BRAIN SCRAMBLE:
 You're a white guy and you want to try to ask a Japanese person directions. Thankfully, you can speak some amount of the language! So you go ahead and ask the question in Japanese, and you do so perfectly! But then, the other guy looks at you uneasily, squints really hard as if they're thinking, while saying, in English: "ah, mm, aah, this is a so hard...ah, mm, prease wait just one moment...mm..."
They know the answer, but they don't know how to say it in English! And yet they try really hard to, even if you asked the question in Japanese and would be okay with a Japanese answer! There you have it, Gaijin Brain Scramble. It's because they're so afraid of disappointing you by not speaking English that they will try incredibly hard even if they don't know more than a few words of the language.

Great Gaijin Perimeter, Julian! It's working while you sleep!

GAIJIN PERIMETER:
 You're on a crowded train, sitting down, and you notice that no one's sitting next to you! All the other seats are occupied, and the ones beside you are the last to be filled. Gaijin Perimeter! This happens because the locals are afraid you'll speak to them in English and they won't be able to answer. As a general rule, the Japanese are far from being a racist people; however, they are incredibly shy around foreigners.


HAMBUN POWERS:
This third category involves powers available to less-visible minorities such as Asians from outside of Japan, as well as half-breeds (hambun, literally "half") like myself.


HAMBUN CAMOUFLAGE:
You're with a group of foreigners and you walk into a bowling place. Your white friend tells the receptionist that the four of you would like to play. All of a sudden, the receptionist turns to YOU, the Hambun, and speaks directly only to you, thinking you are a fluent Japanese speaker! Hambun Camouflage, baby. It's a great ice-breaker when meeting people, but can act as a double-edged blade if you don't know much Japanese (like that one tragedy in Christmas.)



Yeah. I don't get to use most of these, or if I do, it's only to a lesser extent than other foreigners.

And So It Began

So as of today, I now work full-time at My Gym!
You know that feeling you get when you finish your first day at a new job and wonder how the hell you're gonna keep doing it for the new few months/years? That didn't happen.
Today was totally fun and I can see myself learning quickly and doing this for quite a while.

The Yokohama Gym is the smallest one.

What exactly is it I do? Well, for starters, I'm an English Fitness Teacher. Parents enroll their kids to the program if they want their children to develop English listening and speaking skills, as well as flexibility, strength and cardio. My Gym has courses for children from ages ranging from six weeks to thirteen years. The principle is simple; by the time they're done with the program, the kids should have at their disposal better than average balancing skills, flexibility, the ability to do basic gymnastics such as cartwheels and handstands, the ability to climb and fall without getting hurt, the ability to throw and catch properly, good reflexes, good cardio, and the list goes on. The setting is friendly and involves games and music and props. We're not training kids to become master gymnasts, but encouraging them to develop active living skills. We don't do crazy intense drills.
 That being said, I should be able to pay my living expenses really easily with this.
 However, this also means I'll probably be updating the blog a bit less often. Don't get the wrong idea, though. The adventuring doesn't end here. I've plenty to do, including a few bigger trips to Kyoto, Mt Fuji, and eventually Okinawa. Keep in touch!

The Heart of Tokyo

I was at Shibuya briefly today. I tried to meet someone here. We didn't succeed.
 There are 32 million people in Tokyo's greater metropolitan area (city+suburbs). That's almost as much as all of Canada combined. Just the city of Tokyo on its own stands at a whopping 13 million people, almost twice as much as the province of Quebec as a whole, and ten times as many people as there are in Montreal. Every street looks like Ste-Catherine on a sunny Saturday afternoon.
 Though I've been to Shibuya a couple of times, I'm always impressed at the sheer mass of human bodies lining the sidewalks.
If I'm not mistaken, Shibuya has the world's most crowded intersection. That's the one pictured on the left. It baffles me.




One of the better known meeting spots in Shibuya is the statue of the dog, Hachiko, cast in bronze. Hachiko was a dog from the 20's who met his owner every day for a year and a half at the same exact time at the end of every day, near the Shibuya station where his statue now stands. One day, though, Hachiko's owner died of a fatal stroke and didn't make it to the usual meeting location. None the less, Hachiko waited at the designated location. And wait he did, returning to the very same spot at the same time for the next nine years, until the dog himself died of a cancer. Hachiko's story has captured the hearts of the Japanese, and is to this day referred to as a symbol of undying devotion and loyalty.